Experiencing Love: Possible©
Photo: Vann Family
It's taken me nearly three years to bring this dream of Love: Possible© to fruition; during which time, I lost my dad, my dog, my love, my job, and my hair. But it should be mentioned too, that during this particular period of uncertainty and confusion, I also gained a great deal of strength, courage, and wisdom, learned the purpose of forgiveness, and decided to tap into my bag of much-needed common sense.
The death of my father was obviously the most surreal for me (to be honest, I still don't believe that he's gone), but losing my dog and my love along with it, became too much to bear, and ultimately left me broken. During that time, I learned that loss, in most any capacity, while cleansing to the soul, is quite difficult to accept. And trying to brace ourselves for it, only makes us panic, when in actuality it should be used as a chance to embrace change. However, like many of us, the consequences of such change sent me on a downward spiral, where I fell into the realms of denial and depression. I didn't want to talk, I was secretly angry, but I never wanted to burden anyone else with my problems. So I held it in, internalizing everything that I wanted to express, the tears I was too strong to shed, and the vulnerability that I was too proud to expose. And with no one around to console me, writing became my comfort, my ally, my means of expression. It marked its territory as my protector, my refuge, and my safe place—away from hurt, pain, disappointment, and often times, the reality that I failed to otherwise escape from. Love has always defined so much of who I am, so when I felt I was beginning to lose it, I opened my laptop and began to write Love: Possible©.
Before I ever had a title, a direction, or a layout, I had a thought; one which propelled me to both forgive and accept. Forgiveness and acceptance would, in turn, give me hope, space, and the courage to remove all that was, so that I could make room for all that could be. My bleeding of ideas became these vows; and my adoption of truth helped me to not only escape that place of darkness, frustration, and stubbornness, but forced me to re-write my own rules, challenge my own beliefs and opinions, and step outside of myself, to see the truth. We all know that experience brings wisdom, but in my case, it also fueled a desire to help others "fix" their own brokenness.
This section of my website, is thereby dedicated to my journey of self-discovery—the blood, sweat, tears, pain, disappointment, and hard work that all came together to spread the news that Love is Possible!
Now that you've been made aware of the struggle, feel free to witness and/or experience the experience.
The death of my father was obviously the most surreal for me (to be honest, I still don't believe that he's gone), but losing my dog and my love along with it, became too much to bear, and ultimately left me broken. During that time, I learned that loss, in most any capacity, while cleansing to the soul, is quite difficult to accept. And trying to brace ourselves for it, only makes us panic, when in actuality it should be used as a chance to embrace change. However, like many of us, the consequences of such change sent me on a downward spiral, where I fell into the realms of denial and depression. I didn't want to talk, I was secretly angry, but I never wanted to burden anyone else with my problems. So I held it in, internalizing everything that I wanted to express, the tears I was too strong to shed, and the vulnerability that I was too proud to expose. And with no one around to console me, writing became my comfort, my ally, my means of expression. It marked its territory as my protector, my refuge, and my safe place—away from hurt, pain, disappointment, and often times, the reality that I failed to otherwise escape from. Love has always defined so much of who I am, so when I felt I was beginning to lose it, I opened my laptop and began to write Love: Possible©.
Before I ever had a title, a direction, or a layout, I had a thought; one which propelled me to both forgive and accept. Forgiveness and acceptance would, in turn, give me hope, space, and the courage to remove all that was, so that I could make room for all that could be. My bleeding of ideas became these vows; and my adoption of truth helped me to not only escape that place of darkness, frustration, and stubbornness, but forced me to re-write my own rules, challenge my own beliefs and opinions, and step outside of myself, to see the truth. We all know that experience brings wisdom, but in my case, it also fueled a desire to help others "fix" their own brokenness.
This section of my website, is thereby dedicated to my journey of self-discovery—the blood, sweat, tears, pain, disappointment, and hard work that all came together to spread the news that Love is Possible!
Now that you've been made aware of the struggle, feel free to witness and/or experience the experience.
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