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Just A Thought (The Heart of the Matter): 

1/7/2015

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We can't change what we don't acknowledge nor can we fix what we don't believe to be broken. But it is honesty, ladies, that makes up the largest portion of our sanity, and if we love our smiles, desire to be happy, and value who we are, we have to let go of the lies, and embrace the truth. His failure to love you doesn't mean you're unlovable; his inability to value you hasn't made you worthless, and his refusal to see you—all the beauty and love you possess—doesn't make you invisible. If your relationship isn't a relationship, acknowledge that. If your heart is not happy, acknowledge that. And if it's time to move on, acknowledge that too. But if you stay and endure the bullshit, the lies, and the games, there's no one but you to blame for the nonsense. You may not want to start over; you may not want the next woman to reap the benefits of your hard work, or you may feel like you can't live without him, but believe me, you can. [#IfICanYouCan] When you're being neglected, misled, mishandled, and mis-loved, the years you've invested DO NOT MATTER, the way you catered to him DOES NOT MATTER, and how much you love him DOES NOT MATTER, because the sad reality is that if he consistently makes you unhappy, to him, YOU DON'T MATTER. But at the end of the day, the person that matters most is you; the person in charge of your circumstances is you, and the heart of the matter: is YOU. So, if he no longer benefits you, #WalkAway, and #MatterToYou.

-Kanika A. Vann
Author, Love: Possible
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    Author

    I, Kanika Vann (writer, author, editor, journalist, poet, publisher, and love enthusiast), created Love: Possible© with the intent to help save my sisters from the unnecessary pain that accompanies the acceptance of confusion, dysfunction, and disrespect in our romantic relationships, but not without calling special attention to our most valuable relationship—the one we have with ourselves.

    Subsequently, both my book and my website seek to help salvage our realistic expectations and eliminate our unrealistic beliefs. With these words, I aim to transform misconception into certainty, and disillusion into faith, in hopes that you'll each come to recognize who you are, what you are, and what you deserve.

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