Your expectations are only unrealistic if what you ask for doesn't match what you have to offer (or are, at the very least, willing to). So don't stress yourselves out about what you should and shouldn't ask for, or are good enough or not good enough to receive. In reality, we don't always get what we want and sometimes what we think we want turns out to be something we could care less for. #ItHappens. #Often. But if what you desire is something you also possess (or happen to be working toward), don't feel bad about asking for it. While some of us hope to find someone opposite of ourselves, there are just as many who hope to find a mirror. There's nothing wrong with either circumstance. #DontApologize#DontWorry #BeHappy #LoveIsWhereYouFindIt. But ladies, even with that being said, it's one thing to say that he has to have a car, but something totally different if your requirement is a Bentley (when you're driving a Civic; no shade though—shout-out to #Honda). It's perfectly normal for his employment to be a requirement, but it is unrealistic to request that he make 6-figures, unless you too hover around that area. If you look like Wanda or Shanaynay and are hoping to pull Boris Kodjoe or Idris Elba, you need professional help. I'm not saying you can't dream, but at the end of the day, equality, compromise, and reciprocity are what keep our relationships intact. And wanting something you can't give is what truly makes it all unrealistic.
-Kanika A. Vann
Author, Love: Possible
-Kanika A. Vann
Author, Love: Possible
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